In the meantime, again in North America…
The western seaboard is boiling beneath an indignant yellow solar and the nice individuals of Earth exist precariously on the sting of heat-induced psychosis. At any second the strain may erupt into chaos.
And possibly that’s your factor.
We strive to not choose right here at Neural. In any case, planet Earth is at present on the mercy of at the very least half a dozen billionaires who may destroy life as we all know it with the metaphorical wave of their hand.
Anybody ever surprise what would occur if Jeff Bezos hit a killswitch on Amazon Net Providers?
And we received’t even point out the truth that Invoice Gates is the most important proprietor of personal farmland within the US and, conceivably, has backdoor entry to the overwhelming majority of the world’s computer systems.
All of that simply goes to indicate you: the gatekeepers in STEM have an iron grip on the long run. It’s as much as every certainly one of us to loudly declare to the Gates’, Bezos’, and Musks of the world that wealthy individuals aren’t the one ones who could be supervillains.
However you’ll nonetheless want financing. One of many hallmarks of supervillainy – versus common, on a regular basis evil – is that it’s massive and showy. It’s exhausting to be gaudy on a finances.
And that brings us to our first tip: cryptocurrency.
Crypto might not be as in style for felony enterprises as common previous money, however the present tax legal guidelines are so dumb you’ll be able to legally maintain tens of millions in crypto belongings with out paying a dime. It’d be foolish to not run your felony enterprise on cryptocurrency.
There’s such a factor as too evil
Like, for instance, you possibly can use chilly fusion to destroy everybody on the planet. Arguably you possibly can simply use the specter of chilly fusion to gather Bitcoin from everybody – however remember that you’ll be able to’t stack crypto in a warehouse after which mild it on hearth to show how edgy and darkish you might be.
Additionally, you would possibly get lonely if you happen to destroy everybody. Fortunately, there are different methods we will exploit physics to punish the do-gooders and take our rightful place as supreme ruler of the cosmos.
Right here’s just a few primers to get you began, however you’ll want some creativeness. The science is powerful, nevertheless it’s as much as you to determine how stopping or touring by way of time, having a spaceship with a warp drive, or inserting complete planets in quantum superposition will allow you to obtain your nefarious agenda.
You possibly can’t spell villain with out AI
Possibly you’re not a physics nerd. Maybe controlling the very material of the universe is a bit an excessive amount of duty for you. Or, possibly you simply don’t prefer to get your arms soiled. Might I counsel synthetic intelligence?
Certain, killer robots aren’t actually a factor, however you are able to do a lot extra evil with AI than simply use it to shoot, stab, and squish individuals.
Tip quantity 4: Be taught to like the Matrix
Sadly, AI isn’t all the time a viable resolution. What if one other supervillain rises earlier than you, exploits quantum mechanics, and sends us all again to the stone age? Even Iron Man couldn’t tech his method out of a world with out synthetics.
On this case, you’ll have to use extra than simply the material of our universe. And machine intelligence is ineffective in a world with out electrical energy or digital networking.
Nicely, with one massive exception: what if we’re all simply bits of information residing inside a pc simulation?
If that’s the case, you’re going to want to determine learn how to expose and entry the true universe past our simulation.
You’re truly going to want to observe the primary three suggestions in an effort to pull this technique off. As a result of, if comedian books have taught us something, you’ll most likely want a spaceship with a warp drive and an AI system. You’re going to should fly by way of a supermassive black gap.
The way to deal with superheroes
Assuming you’ve managed to reside by way of your origin story, developed a deep-seeded hatred for… one thing (the world, humanity, pop up advertisements, it doesn’t actually matter what) and determined the way you’re going to beat the galaxy, you’ll must be prepared for these pesky superheroes.
Inevitably, you’ll get some tights-wearing do-gooders who want for nothing greater than to see you delivered to justice.
Whereas this can largely be a reactionary endeavor – you’ll want to reply to regardless of the powers of justice throw at you – the very best protection is to not be there.
To that finish, we propose you strongly think about organising a base of operations off-planet and guaranteeing that your bodily physique isn’t the one level of failure that may upend your life’s work.
We right here at Neural hope you’ve discovered this text insightful and, maybe, even inspiring.
Turning into the supervillain you’ve all the time wished to be isn’t a straightforward activity. It requires dedication, fervor, and simply the correct quantity of psychopathy.
However we additionally know that not everybody has the time or endurance to turn out to be a quantum physicist or to revolutionize the fields of AI and robotics. And, realistically, there’s extra money in being a daily science villain than an excellent one (see: Google, Fb).
Don’t let that cease you from following your evil desires although. You possibly can nonetheless assist. Simply bear in mind to all the time observe the YouTube algorithm wherever it takes you, spend as a lot time on Fb and Twitter as attainable, and, most significantly, idolize tech billionaires and their trillion-dollar corporations.
In these methods, we will all do our half to help supervillainy.